Gratz to the Feds

According to the ACLU gender identity is now protected from employment discrimination within the federal government. I know this has to be a huge relief for families if TG employees. My partners place of employment has non-discrim policies and its nice to know his employer affords some protection even though the state where we live in does not. Of course, we still have some worry when there comes a time when his documented gender could come up, but so far so good, and hopefully it will stay that way.

A Great Step Forward in a Long Journey

This is a little late because I got caught up in school, but The big news in the GLBT community last week was Pres. Obama signing the Matthew Shepard Act into law. This law brings the GLBT community into the classes protected from hate crimes. It was a long, painful road to get here, but it makes me even more optimistic that every day will bring more headway on the GLBT rights front. I get discouraged sometimes because it seems like everything we want to do is a fight. My beloved and I want to adopt a child within a couple of years of my graduation, we want to get married, and we want to protect what little we have scraped together while working towards our future. But to do all this we have to take 50 million more things into account than your normal couple.

For example, adoption. The state we live in makes it illegal for us to adopt a baby, since technically, we are still a gay couple. So we are looking at out of the country adoption but the international adoption book says that no country will KNOWINGLY place a baby with a gay couple. So I apply as a single person? Doesn't that disregard what will be a 12-13 year long, great relationship? Where does that leave Hayden as a parent? And what about us being a trans couple and Hayden legally being male by then? Or do I try to get pregnant even that it will cost a mint, and due to health problems, I might not be able carry it to term? But it will give us more protection as a family.

All of these things to think about just to start a family with my partner. In some ways its good because we can plan, but bad because we HAVE to plan. The hope I have for it all is that it will be easier for us because I am (well will be) a lawyer, that the rules will change, and that everything, as ususal, will work out exactly the way it is supposed to.

DOMA & Marry Memories

The ABA is asking Congress to repeal the section of DOMA that denies federal benefits to legally married gay couples. I absolutely love the fact that the ABA is standing up for GLBT rights. While I do wish that the DOMA in it's entirety would be struck down, I also realize that small steps forward are still steps.

In fact, sometimes I am amazed at how far gay rights have come since I came out 15 years ago. I was cleaning out my bookshelves over my break and flipping through my gay book collection. One book I have is The Essential Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings. I remember buying that in my local Books-a-Few 9 years ago, I remember the stares and down right evil looks I got as I paid for it, and how certain people would no longer shop in the store I worked in within the same mall after I bought it, I remember how hard it was to hold me head up and look people who liked me a second ago in the eye as the hate washed over their faces. But what struck me most about it was the fact that it was a handbook on how to make your wedding the best it could be with what little, if any, resources the GLBT community had back then. There was nothing to fall back on, unless you lived in a MAJOR city, when planning your wedding but your own creativity and desire for the ceremony.

Now there are gay couples getting married on TV, theKnot.com has a same-sex ceremony site, cities and states are legalizing our marriages and unions, gay honeymoon packages abound, the new edition of The Essential Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings is available, and there are more marriage resources than you can shake a stick at.

I guess the point I am trying to make is, yes, it is frustrating to still be fighting the homophobes that shriek when we walk through the door and clutch their children in fear, it is frustrating that we are denied basic human rights, but we HAVE made progress and continue to do so. Every little step still is a step pulling us closer and closer to equality and farther away from the time where a girl had to be afraid to buy a simple little book. And I am glad that I am becoming a part of the fight to go forward.

GLBT Roundup

In the past month I have neglected to post about some interesting events within the GLBT world. I had read about them but my priority at that time was studying for my first round of 1L finals rather than blogging, so here is some things I wanted to write about but never got the chance.

The Matthew Shepard Bill is moving through the legislature and towards approval. 10 years in the making but definitely a step in the right direction. There needs to be more hate crimes laws passed that include GLBT words rather than narrowing the scope of the laws to protect for racial or religious reasons only.

The M.A. A.G. is suing the US Government to force them to extend benefits to the gays couples who are legally married in that state. While this will not affect the marriage rights of gay couples in other states, if she wins, it does give us some legal precedent to start moving forward with. With small legal victory only sets the stage for larger ones down the line. I have watched GLBT issues change and grow since I came out 15 years ago, these legal battles will continue that growth.

Bill O'Reilly had a grand time mocking Oregon's Trans Mayor Stu Rasmussen. The fact that Fox News allows this man to openly mock someone for their sexual and gender identity in 2009 shocks me to the core. These larger companies have to see that by allowing this to be said in national television it only reaffirms the hate and fear people carry concerning members of the GLBT community. My partner is Trans and we know first hand how fear and hatred can be potentially dangerous and lethal. While I do not advocate censorship, Fox News needs to stick to reporting the facts and not let hateful personal opinions pollute their airwaves. Would they allowed it had the insults been racially or religiously motivated? I highly doubt it.

Three cheers to the following for coming out in support for GLBT rights: Bill Clinton, Miss Universe, YWCA, St. Paul, M.N., Vermont Senator Leahy, and the Quakers! Hurrah!

Turning the Tables

The ABA journal posted this article about gays suing various people and intuitions that refuse to take part or be connected with same sex ceremonies. Among them are the eHarmony website, a Christian photographer that refused to take pictures of a same sex ceremony and state entities that want to bar services to gays.

Being part of the GLBT community myself, I understand the fight for equal rights and wanting to be treated fairly by everyone as the straight community is but this is absurd. For example, why force people to perform same sex ceremonies, photograph them or otherwise participate in them when they obviously do not want to. First, this is supposed to be the happiest day of your life. Why ruin it by having it performed by some sour faced minister that thinks you and your partner are repugnant forms of humanity that should and will burn in the fiery pits of hell for all eternity. I would prefer someone who actually was happy for me blessing my new life. Second, there are churches, officiants, party planners, photographers etc etc that would be THRILLED to get their hands on our "dual income- no kid" wallet. Let them and support those that support us.

But most importantly, when we force our beliefs and morals on the Religous Right we are, essentially, no better then them. How can we wave our fists and demand the right to marry without them throwing King James at us when we are going to march into their churches and demand they marry us? Now we are the asses forcing others to believe our way, when we have been fighting against that same thing for decades.

Lets do what we have been telling them to do to us for years. Leave your beliefs out of my life.