DOMA & Marry Memories

The ABA is asking Congress to repeal the section of DOMA that denies federal benefits to legally married gay couples. I absolutely love the fact that the ABA is standing up for GLBT rights. While I do wish that the DOMA in it's entirety would be struck down, I also realize that small steps forward are still steps.

In fact, sometimes I am amazed at how far gay rights have come since I came out 15 years ago. I was cleaning out my bookshelves over my break and flipping through my gay book collection. One book I have is The Essential Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings. I remember buying that in my local Books-a-Few 9 years ago, I remember the stares and down right evil looks I got as I paid for it, and how certain people would no longer shop in the store I worked in within the same mall after I bought it, I remember how hard it was to hold me head up and look people who liked me a second ago in the eye as the hate washed over their faces. But what struck me most about it was the fact that it was a handbook on how to make your wedding the best it could be with what little, if any, resources the GLBT community had back then. There was nothing to fall back on, unless you lived in a MAJOR city, when planning your wedding but your own creativity and desire for the ceremony.

Now there are gay couples getting married on TV, theKnot.com has a same-sex ceremony site, cities and states are legalizing our marriages and unions, gay honeymoon packages abound, the new edition of The Essential Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings is available, and there are more marriage resources than you can shake a stick at.

I guess the point I am trying to make is, yes, it is frustrating to still be fighting the homophobes that shriek when we walk through the door and clutch their children in fear, it is frustrating that we are denied basic human rights, but we HAVE made progress and continue to do so. Every little step still is a step pulling us closer and closer to equality and farther away from the time where a girl had to be afraid to buy a simple little book. And I am glad that I am becoming a part of the fight to go forward.